Strike the Match

Until there's an inferno

There was a time when I couldn’t stop talking about the injustice, inequality, and cruelty that shape American politics. I would be posting, arguing, shouting from the rooftops, and getting into nasty face-to-face arguments. Is it age that has dampened my fire or exhaustion? If I’m being honest, it’s probably a little bit of both. I’m at a loss for the words that used to come so easily and freely every time yet another black person was executed by police or another woman was blamed for being raped by a misogynist man. Maybe it’s because I’ve removed all of the red hats from my life, so I’m no longer directly exposed to their hatred and bigotry. Whatever the cause, I’ve been a shell of myself since January 2025, so I’m going to try to write on Substack as often as possible in an attempt to not let myself be buried in despair. I’ve been going to the protests, marching with signs, donating to the right (left) causes, writing postcards, calling my Senators, and yours, but I’m not ignited with passion and audacity the way I once was. I know this is exactly what they want. This “administration” is banking on more of us becoming emotionally buried so that we can’t lift ourselves into the fight.

So here’s my re-ignition, my lift off back into the fray, and what I’ve been sharing with those closest to me since 2013. This is what worries me most if we don’t learn from other countries that experienced the same phenomenon. Thirteen years ago, as a returning college student, I compared religious terrorist groups in the Middle East to extreme Christianity in the United States. I warned that extremism in religion would continue here, leaking into public policy until we are forced to face a reckoning or revolution. I surmised that the fear of extinction of the old way of thinking must be met collaboratively, lest we risk falling under a theocracy, similar to 1970s Iraq. If you haven’t already, take a look at a side-by-side comparison of Iraqi women in the 1970s vs. today and see if you can connect any dots I didn’t fully realize I was connecting as a 27-year-old undergrad. It seemed unrealistic then to suggest that we would experience a social extinction burst in the United States; surely, I thought, we’re all smart enough and evolved enough to walk alongside progress rather than against it. Go ahead, I’m laughing too.

Since you’re on Substack, I’m sure you know this already, but allow me to type it out anyway. An extinction burst is a fervent increase and intensification in behavior or way of thinking when those who benefit from said behavior fear that their way of life is threatened, and the rewards of that system may go extinct. Think of “the good ol days” when men were men and nothing else was even worth consideration. Now consider what kind of behavior is experiencing a surge. If you answered red pill ‘manosphere’ misogyny and racism as the intensifying behavior, good, you’re tapped into what many refuse to acknowledge. And I’m sure you’ve also noticed that women and minorities are once again being blamed for this desperate attempt at relevance by men who refuse to evolve, and why Trump and the Heritage Foundation want us knocked up at home and out of professional fields. Is it really unexpected that we’d find ourselves in our current political situation? “Who can trust [insert target of choice] to fly a plane, perform surgery, manage businesses?” We need to remember our place, under the bodies and thumbs of white men.

For the first time in American history, women of all ethnicities do not need to marry men for economic security. Women are earning degrees at a higher rate than men and are the majority of first-time homebuyers nationwide, despite still earning less. Women also make up 51% of the population, so let’s be real, it makes sense that we’re outperforming men; there are just more of us. Women are also recognizing that they deserve more out of relationships with men than what their mothers and grandmothers were forced to accept, or they may choose to remain single rather than commit to an underdeveloped man. These decisions by women are the consequences of men’s actions. Unfortunately, because society refuses to encourage boys and men to emote anything other than anger and entitlement, their consequences are met with the collective male temper tantrum; Neanderthal like podcasters shaping the minds of men and boys who refuse to look at their own culpability in what they call “the male loneliness epidemic.”

Women and girls have de-centered men and boys in their lives. And my god, they canNOT handle it. We have taken their favorite toy away, and they are demanding that it be returned to its “natural” spot… the kitchen. Minorities are not giving white people unearned respect simply for being “superior”, and minorities are getting more fun things than white guys! White guys want a white history month, a white music tv channel, a whole special unit in your children’s classrooms! No fair! Reaping the benefits of man-made societal superiority is increasingly difficult when the rest of us don’t participate.

The bible is what your neighborhood Christian Nationalist believes should be the foundational document of our country, not the Constitution. As luck would have it, the bible centers men as the most significant member of the family, second only to God himself. The fact that Christian Nationalism has entered the highest echelons of our governing bodies bewilders me. I saw it coming, and still I can’t believe it. That being said, I have to believe it’s the final exhale of our country’s extinction burst. I hope it’s the death rattle. The cliff we find ourselves standing on now is starting to feel more like a knife’s edge, and I wish I could get a promise of commitment from everyone that we won’t end up going from a free society to hiding women, erasing people of color, and criminalizing LGBTQIA. I will promise to fight to keep advancing progress. I promise to write myself out of the hole of despair I sometimes find myself in. I promise this to myself because I cannot lose who I am in this orchestrated chaos. So here’s to the first match struck as I rebuild my fire.